Harmony among the major faiths has become an essential ingredient of peaceful coexistence in our world. From this perspective, mutual understanding among these traditions is not merely the business of religious believers — it matters for the welfare of humanity as a whole.”

—http://www.nytimes.com/2010/05/25/opinion/25gyatso.html?src=me&ref=general

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One idea that comes to mind regarding prayer in college is the image of a student nervous about his or her exam scores, making deals with God such as promising to change his behaviour in exchange for good grades on the exams. I hate to admit that I, too, was guilty of doing that at times. However, as time went on, I grew to realise that my relationship with God was meant for more than just a business deal. Today, I view my relationship with God to be very similar to my relationship with one of my best friends- God is someone that will always be there for me during my good times and my bad times, will always understand my troubles and will even be able to give me the strength to overcome such obstacles in life.

I understand that it sounds rather odd to consider a God or any ‘higher power’ as one of my equals, but for some reason, putting God on a pedestal as the ‘Almighty’ doesn’t feel right. This is not to say that those that believe otherwise are wrong – these are merely my thoughts and opinions. I feel that because of this newfound friendship with God, praying doesn’t really feel like a chore any more, but rather, a conversation with a close friend.

Now that I look back, I can see that a lot of my thoughts have definitely changed from a year ago.

What are your thoughts on the idea of having a friendship with God?

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However, I’ve noticed that I often forget to appreciate the little things in the day because I’m in such a rush. This may be true for others as well. Not to sound cliche, but what about stopping and smelling the flowers? As we make our way through the day and are running from one place to the other, we often encounter many friends as well as many strangers that subtly help us get through the day in one way or another. With regards to friends, they help us so that we don’t go crazy as we fight to get through the day;  the strangers who help us could be anyone, whether it is the crossing guard that stops the traffic so that we can get to class on time or the stranger that keeps the door open for us when we’re entering a building. At times we’re so engrossed in our own little worlds that we often forget to thank those strangers for their kind and helpful actions. The obvious, but somewhat difficult solution is to take the extra 2 seconds to thank them. A secondary solution would be to go beyond thanking them by paying it forward and helping someone else during their day. That, however, is a topic for another post.

For now, I’d like to thank everyone for helping me get through my days — in one way or another, you have all helped me maintain my sanity.

To my family, my friends, my gurus and my strangers:

Thank you!

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Hinduism has many proscriptions for familial relations — the rakhi festival is one example, and filial piety in general is another. It is said in Hindu mythology that when Lord Ganesha was asked to race against his swifter brother thrice around the universe, that he instead walked around his parents three times, hands clasped in reverence.

There are also many examples in mythology of friendship — for instance, in the Mahabharata, there is the bond between the warrior Arjuna and Lord Krishna. In the other great Hindu epic, the Ramayana, the brotherly love and friendship between Rama and Lakshmana is deep and profound.

But most important to our lives as college students in a co-ed school is the subject of romantic relationships. It’s a touchy subject, especially since the vast history of Hinduism seems to consider marriage as the only legitimate romantic interaction. Lord Vishnu may be married to Lakshmi, but I doubt that prior to marriage they went on a first date, followed by a candlelit dinner. And even the most romantic courtship in the epics, that between Sita and Rama, was just a matter of stringing a bow.

It’s not clear how this old attitude about romantic relationships as solely marriage translates into the present — the more important question is, should they? Or should we disregard them and pursue what we want? I’m inclined to disregard them, since today’s society is different from that of the epics. But at the same time, there’s a feeling of obligation to considering what our ancestors thought and felt. Considering how much time college students spend thinking about romantic interactions, this is clearly an issue that Hinduism has left unaddressed.

Family, friendship, and romance — how do you feel about the relationships in your life, and how do your personal beliefs affect that?

P.S. I’m not familiar with any scriptural advice on any of these matters, so do comment if you feel you’ve read something relevant.

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In his post yesterday, Saketh mentioned that for him, “the most valuable friendships are between those who are alike in virtue.”

Thinking about this, I came to the question: What really defines a good friend? Is it simply that virtues are alike? While I partly agree with what Saketh said, I also very much agree with something Henry Ford once said:

“My best friend is the one that brings out the best in me.”

In a very inspiring article by Swami Tyagananda, the swami in the Vedanta Society of Boston, he says that being in the presence of different people brings out our own different tendencies. I know I have noticed, and sometimes been disturbed by how some people act so differently, based on whom they are hanging out with — their language style changes, their choice of topics to discuss change, and even certain mannerisms change. Even more disturbingly, I have noticed that it isn’t just other people that do this — I, too, am unconsciously influenced by the people whom I spend time with. Certain people tend to bring out my tendency to gossip; others bring out my fun, energetic side; still others bring out my “aunty” qualities; and still others bring out my passion for discussing deeper, meaningful topics. Swami Tyagananda mentioned how important it is to notice what effect others have on you — and to decide what to do accordingly. In this sense, his article is a little unclear: If certain people bring out our base qualities, is it better to avoid them? Or is the realization that they have this effect on us enough for us to stop being affected so easily by others?

In any case, my views on friendship are very much based on that idea — my best friends are those who bring out the best in me, who help me to realize my potential, and constantly encourage me to think deeper, to act with sincerity and love, and correct me when I wander onto the wrong path.

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