Last year I wrote a post that referenced the question of polygamy. I’d like to continue that discussion by citing this recent New York Times article, which features the stories of those in India who are part of some of the few remaining polyandrous marriages (one woman, multiple husbands). The article goes on to explain the practicality of polyandry:
In the remote villages of this Himalayan valley, polyandry, the practice of multiple men marrying one wife, was for centuries a practical solution to a set of geographic, economic and meteorological problems.People here survived off small farms hewed from the mountainsides at an altitude of 11,000 feet, and dividing property among several sons would leave each with too little land to feed a family. A harsh mountain winter ends the short planting season abruptly. The margin between starvation and survival is slender.
“We used to work and eat,” Ms. Devi said, her face etched by decades of blistering winters, her fingers thick from summers of tilling the soil. “There was no time for anything else. When three brothers share one lady, they all come back to one house. They share everything.”
…
“If you marry a different woman, then there are more chances of family disputes,” Mr. Bhagsen said. “Family property is divided, and problems arise.”
Was this precisely the reality of Draupadi and the five Pandavas? Was her loyalty to five husbands key to them sticking by each other (“paanchon mili to ban gaye mutthi” -Lagaan)?
The article continues to say that the practice of polyandry is now outdated:
“That system had utility for a time,” Mr. Bhagsen said. “But in the present context it has outlived its usefulness. The world has changed.”
Do you agree? Maybe the larger question is, and remains, do we marry for some emotion called love, or for more practical considerations? And if it is the latter, which I am inclined to think (because love can presumably sustain itself without marriage, whereas we look for a lifestyle – a practical consideration – when choosing to marry), then could polygamy/polyandry have some degree of usefulness that we are just not willing to admit?
And what about the moral question of having more than one “jeevansaathi”? What restricts us from having multiple soulmates, or life partners? What makes us uncomfortable about being in a nonexclusive relationship? I would hazard a guess to say it has something to do with having some sort of absolute power and control over another being. But maybe it is about absolute and equal trust and loyalty, which we cynically believe cannot occur between more than two people. What do you think?
