I’ve found that sometimes the idea of “helping others” that seems to be encompassed by unselfishness amounts to self-sacrifice. And I’ve come to believe that this should not be the case — until you are strong enough not to be affected or harmed (emotionally or physically) by helping others, it sometimes seems to be detrimental to continue sacrificing your time and mental/emotional effort to help others. It is sometimes better to become stronger first, and then try to help lift others up — only when you are detached enough to see others’ problems with a birds-eye view, without getting caught up in emotional stress or mental weariness, will you truly be able to be unselfish in terms of helping others. Otherwise, the residual effects of feeling like you’ve helped someone will remain. When you are strong, helping others comes naturally, because it is at no cost to your personal happiness — because you are already at a state of internal satisfaction.

The other view is that perhaps by helping others we will develop this strength on our own…My experience has taught me that sometimes it is harder to develop the strength that way — but I might definitely be wrong (and maybe the aforementioned way is just a way for me to justify my selfishness) — based on your experience, what have you guys found?

Thoughts?

In this definition of success, Swami Vivekananda is dividing by zero, ensuring infinite success

So to answer the question you posed, Saketh, reduce your denominator!  Put in your best efforts, but detach yourself from the results.  Live, and let live.  Help others.  Share.  That, to me, is unselfishness.